My Brother
by sm16157
Summary: Spin off of Heartless Love. If you haven't read that, then that's fine. Loki misses his brother, Thor, and Thor misses him too. What will happen when Loki becomes desperate to reunite with his brother?


_"We'll always be best friends, Loki," Thor smiled down at his younger brother._

_ Loki sniffled. "But you're _always_ the popular one. No one invites me to have fun. I'm always left at home to play chess with Father."_

_ The young demigod hugged his crying sibling. "I promise that I won't go anywhere without you anymore."_

_ "Promise?"_

_ "Of course. You're my brother. Nothing in the nine realms can ever separate us."_

_ A hint of a smile made its way onto Loki's face. "Yes, you're right."_

_ Thor ruffled Loki's hair forcefully. "When am I not?"_

_ The two laughed, the sun setting cheerfully on a good Asgardian day._

Loki sat up in bed, putting his head in his hand. He felt a warm dampness on his cheeks. Tears. He slid out of the covers and shuffled to the kitchen, his hair falling in his face and his robe dragging on the floor. He found that he had been coming here often due to his trouble sleeping at night lately. He heated some milk in kettle over the stove and sat at the table, waiting. It was all because of those dreams, more like memories, that had been recurring. Memories that he had pushed aside for years. He had to forget about Thor and their "sibling love." This was a relationship that could never be saved. At a certain point, Loki knew he had to let it go. It was futile trying to keep together something that was already falling apart. He hadn't thought about it since then. Now he was having these dreams, bringing back feelings of sadness and nostalgia.

The kettle began to steam and soon a whistle sounded through the dark and empty kitchen. Loki grabbed a mug and poured the hot milk into it, the comforting smell soothing him. He returned to his seat and sipped the white liquid, his eyelids starting to droop. Soon enough, he had fallen asleep at the kitchen table, his milk left unfinished.

….

Thor laughed loudly, his guffawing filling the whole dining room with sound. He shoved another bread roll into his mouth hungrily, a piece of heaven in his mouth. Volstagg happily took a big bite into his fifth turkey leg, the warm juices dripping down his mouth.

"Enjoying your birthday feast, my lord?" asked Fandral.

"Of course!" Thor chugged his beer. "The cooks have really outdone themselves, eh?" He turned to face Loki's old seat, slightly disappointed when he remembered that it was empty.

Fandral's smile faltered slightly. "They have." He raised his wine glass. "To the king of Asgard! May he continue to lead Asgard to victory year after year!"

The table of one hundred cheered. "To the king!" After a long moment of clinking glasses, the guests drank the expensive wine in celebration.

Thor looked down at his plate, keeping a grin on his face. But he couldn't help but think of his brother, whose birthday would be the next day. He solemnly sipped his wine, thinking to himself. "And to Loki, my wonderful brother," he silently toasted.

…

_ "Thor! Loki! Breakfast!"_

_ The two boys raced to the grand dining hall, speedily taking their seats._

_ "I beat you this time, Thor!" Loki declared proudly._

_ Thor punched him playfully in the arm. "That's because I let you!"_

_ "You did not!"_

_ A giant plate of Asgardian pastries was set before the two gods._

_ "Now," Frigga, their mother, said from behind them. "The cook made pastries today, but she only made this many. You two will have to share."_

_ "Share?!" Thor protested._

_ "You will have to figure it out yourselves." Frigga glided out of the room._

_ Loki's mouth watered at the sight of the pastries. "Let's just take as many as we each can, and let's see what happens," he suggested._

_ His brother nodded. "Alright."_

_ They both devoured the pastries ravenously until there was only a single golden, fluffy sliver of cake left. They both looked at each other, knowing that they each wanted it for their own. _

_ "Um," Loki broke the tense silence. "You can go ahead and have it, Brother. I'm full." _

_ Thor knew that he wasn't, but took the cake anyways. "Thanks." He noticed his younger brother watching him in jealousy as he raised the delicious slice to his mouth. He put the cake back down, breaking it in half. He handed Loki the bigger piece. "Here."_

_ Loki's eyes widened. "Are you sure, Brother?"_

_ Thor nodded._

_ They both put the cake into their mouths at the same time, a simultaneous "mmmm!" suggesting the deliciousness of the cake. They both smiled at each other gratefully. _

_ "Thanks, Brother!" _

"Loki, breakfast," a gentle voice pulled Loki out of his dreams.

Loki lifted his heavy head off the mahogany table to look at Lasca who was holding a giant Asgardian cake. "Oh…"

She set it in front of him. "I tried my best. You've seemed kind of down lately and it's your birthday, too, so I thought you'd like this." She cut him a slice and gently shoved it before him.

Loki took a piece with his fork politely and put it into his mouth. The taste was very familiar. It was the same cake from a certain day when two little Asgardian princes first learned to share. He shoved the cake away and stood, walking away from the table.

"Loki!" Lasca scolded. "Where are you going?"

He didn't answer. Instead he walked to his study, slamming the door as loudly as he could.

….

_"Brother, you look so lonely." Little Loki approached Thor, who was huddled in a corner._

_ "Oh… Well none of the other children wanted to play with me today."_

_ "I'll play with you, Brother."_

_ "Really?"_

_ "Yeah! Because that's what brothers are for!" Loki grinned happily. "Let's play army, okay?"_

_ Thor got up. "Yeah, that sounds fun!"_

"My king."

"Hm?" Thor snapped out of his daydream.

"We've received a request for a friendly visit to Valhalla."

"From whom?"

"A certain Lord Ikol of Niflheim."

"Niflheim?"

"Yes, my lord."

"That's certainly very odd."

"Yes, my lord. He is hoping that he would be able to speak with you."

"That can be arranged."

"Very good, my lord. Shall I make preparations for his room?"

"Yes. When will he be arriving?"

"Tomorrow, sir."

"Very good. You are dismissed."

….

"Are you sure about this?" Lasca asked uncertainly, combing through "Lord Ikol's" wavy hair, the blonde strands reaching past his shoulder blades.

"I am," Ikol replied, his voice light and airy. He looked up at Lasca with his emerald green eyes. "You promise me you will not be lonely?"

"I promise. I told you, I've been alone all my life. I'm not five, Loki, oh, sorry, Ikol," she corrected herself.

Ikol nodded. "I know. I'm just making sure." He stood, his heavy silver armor glinting in the light of the fire. He grasped the hilt of his long sword. "I'm leaving now."

Lasca kissed his cheek. "Good luck."

Ikol smiled slightly, pressing his thin but soft lips to her hand. "Farewell."

….

"Right this way, Lord Ikol," a muscular guard guided, escorting the lean Lord Ikol to the throne room.

"It's just as elaborate as I remember," Ikol muttered to himself.

Thor smiled as the wealthy ambassador stepped into the hall. "Welcome to Asgard, Lord Ikol of Niflheim."

Ikol bowed reverently. "Thank you, King Thor," he replied quietly.

"I'm really quite surprised to see someone from Niflheim. I hear no one lives there."

"Yes. Only I do. I like the cold, you see."

The Asgardian king nodded.

_"I love snow, don't you?" Loki asked, catching tiny blurs of white on his outstretched tongue._

_ "No… not really. It's too cold. Let's go back inside," Thor whined._

_ "No! Let's make a little person out of snow! It'll be fun!"_

_ "You're so weird, Brother. You'll freeze to death."_

_ "You're just a baby who can't handle the cold."_

_ "What did you say?" Thor balled up a handful of the snow and threw it roughly at his little brother._

_ "Hey!" Loki returned the snowball with an even larger one. He laughed when the cold matter flew right into his older brother's now red face. "I challenge you to a battle!"_

_ "I accept!"_

Thor returned to reality. "Oh, yes. I do, too."

Ikol brushed the hair out of his face, tucking an extraordinarily blonde lock behind his pale ear. "Asgard is very beautiful."

"Yes. My forefathers built this palace themselves."

"Ah, very impressive."

….

It had been a while since Loki, or Ikol, had been to Valhalla. Five years, at the least. It brought back memories of a past where he and Thor were brothers. Actual brothers. He remembered running down these halls as a boy with Thor chasing after him screaming "I'll get you, Brother! The real you!" Ikol took small and slow steps as he strolled past bedrooms, ballrooms, dining rooms and entertainment halls, following Thor as the powerful king gave him a tour of a place Ikol knew all too well. He stopped when they passed by a glass case that proudly displayed Loki's old scepter from when he was an honored prince and warrior.

"What's this?" Ikol asked innocently.

Thor turned and saw what Ikol was looking at. The hero's expression darkened. "That was my brother's," he spoke quietly, hinting that it was not something he wanted to talk or think about.

"Oh…" Ikol cautiously put his hand on the glass, gazing at the weapon with a somewhat longing expression on his face.

"Now, moving on." Thor turned back around and continued on his way.

"If you don't mind my asking, what happened to your brother?"

"He… did not turn out the way my parents had wanted. He betrayed all of us and ran off with a Midgardian woman and then conquered all nine realms. You have not heard of him? Loki, son of Laufey?"

"Ah yes, I know of him. He is your brother?"

"He was."

"Who is he now?"

Thor did not answer and instead kept walking, never saying another word until he had led Lord Ikol to his quarters.

…

The only time Loki could revert to his original appearance was in the shower, where it was guaranteed that no one would see him. Although one would not expect it, it took an incredible amount of energy to hold up an illusion for such a long time. Loki massaged the fragrant shampoo into his scalp as warm water poured onto his head. How long would it be before he felt comfortable enough to show Thor who Ikol really was? It could be a few months, or a few decades. It was hard to tell. Loki wasn't the best at making friends, but when he did, they were always very close. Wrapping a soft robe around his wet body, Loki looked into the steamed up mirror hanging above the golden sink. Dark bags hung under his tired eyes, however, in his bright blue irises, he saw a determination that could never be broken.

…

Ikol found the Asgardian king on the main balcony. He put his hand against the door frame, his skinny form casting a long shadow on the ground in the moonlight. He debated whether or not he should step outside to talk to Thor. In the end, he decided that it might be a good idea. His knee high leather boots clicked on the hard surface of the cement floor as he walked over to Thor.

"Is something troubling you, King Thor?"

Thor shook his head. "No. I appreciate your concern, however."

"Of course." Ikol gazed up at the full Asgardian moon, the luminescent white orb reflecting in his green irises. "I haven't seen this moon in a very long time."

"You have been to Asgard before?"

"Many, many years ago. Before your time."

"Ah. Has it changed much in your opinion?"

Ikol thought for a moment. "No."

"I hope that is a good thing."

"It is. Asgard is a lovely realm."

"It is. How is Niflheim?"

"Lonely."

"Then why do you live there? Why do you not live in a more populated realm?"

"Because I have no other choice."

"Why not?"

"I do not wish to explain." Ikol leaned on the railing, his blonde tips barely touching the unsullied metal.

Thor looked back out over the edge, a solemn expression on his face. "You asked me who Loki is to me now."

Ikol glanced at him, surprised that he brought it up. "Yes."

"Well, I shall tell you. He is still my brother. Although everyone else rejects him with all their bodies and souls, in my heart, I cannot push him away."

Ikol stared at the king, not saying anything.

"I admit, I have begun to miss his presence recently." Thor's expression softened for a moment, showing a gentler side of him. Then he hardened once again. "But Loki has betrayed us all. The fact is that he will never return." With that, Thor turned and walked back inside, leaving Ikol out in the cold night, a longing expression on his face.

…

_Several Years Later_

"Ikol! Let us go hunting!" Thor leaped out of the throne and grabbed his bow and arrow.

"Yes. That sounds entertaining." Ikol, the king's closest friend, slung his silver quiver over his shoulder.

The two made their way to the large Asgardian forest where a variety of game lived, such as deer and elk. Ikol trudged through the snow, weaving around large oak trees. He decided on a spot and waited quietly, Thor by his side. Suddenly, the two heard rustling.

"I've got him," Ikol whispered, spotting a lovely large stag.

He readied his bow, a soft crackling noise echoing through woods as he drew an arrow. The stag raised his head in alarm. The animal took off, fearing for his life. Ikol smiled and loosed the arrow. Despite the stag's outrageous speed, the arrow still pierced him and the animal dropped to the snowy ground, dead.

Thor slapped Ikol on the back. "A job well done!" he congratulated him.

Ikol grinned. "Why thank you."

"I must admit, you shoot very well. Your style reminds me of him."

Neither of the two friends ever spoke Loki's name anymore. In fact, no one did. Loki was simply referred to as "him" and at this point, everyone knew who "he" was, whatever the context.

"Does it?" Ikol slipped his shiny silver bow back into his quiver.

Thor nodded. "Outstanding accuracy."

"Why thank you." Ikol looked up at the sky, admiring the way the bare dark branches looked against the slate gray clouds. "Thor, I am not sure that this is the right time, but I suppose I should just tell you now, while I'm thinking about it."

"Anything."

Ikol stepped closer to Thor, putting his hand on his shoulder, locking eyes with him. Then, just as wind would blow away red and yellow fall leaves, the disguise Loki had been using for years blew off him, revealing the original being underneath it.

"Loki…?" Thor breathed in disbelief.

Loki felt anxiousness creep through his body. "Br-brother," he stammered uncertainly.

Thor pulled him into a hug, resting his chin on his brother's shoulder, almost crushing Loki's lean body with his strong arms. "My brother…"

Neither of them uttered another word. Snowflakes swirled around them, brisk breezes hitting their tear streaked faces as they stood in a tight embrace.

_"Give up this poisonous dream!" Thor gripped Loki's face, getting the traitor to face in his direction. "You come home."_

You come home.

You _came_ home.


End file.
